Tag Archives: action

Free Fall and Progress Paralysis

How many times have you heard variations on the saying that when you reach the end of all you know you will develop wings and fly? Yeah, but there’s still that first step. And that can be a doozy! And positively paralyzing.

Sitting in the corner with a box of chocolates seems sooooo tempting! So many reality shows, so little time. This might be a good time to move up the scale a bit. Perhaps, the next step is something I call meaningless productivity. You might call it busy work.

Keep the chocolates. Don’t even turn off the television. Above all, don’t think. Sort, declutter, clean. The first sort is simply to get rid of junk. Life is easier when you are not surrounded by piles-o-stuff. As you open up living space, you are also opening up space to think.

Do you feel your muscles getting ready to move? Not quite yet? Maybe you need to wallow a little more. When you start noticing that you’re watching reruns of reality shows you saw last week, it’s time to step up your game.

Go slow! This is rehab. Go for a walk. Cook yourself a good meal. Allow your mind to wander through all the things you might possibly do next. You can still spend a lot of time on the couch, but maybe it’s time to trade up to PBS or political satire shows. You should still sort, but this round will be a work-related sort. Where are all of those projects you have started? Where are all of those idea files that you have been keeping for years? Find them now!

Sort your ideas and projects into three piles. The first pile is, “What was I thinking?” the second pile is,”Not so much.” The third pile has you starting to bounce in your chair just a bit. You actually think you might want to do something. You are beginning to see a future.

If you watch a cat in free fall, it seems paralyzed for the first few seconds. It does nothing. Then,it does a seemingly miraculous mid-stream correction. It lands beautifully on all four paws. You can do it too! You are ready to land with both feet planted firmly on the ground. You are ready to go on to the next phase of your life!

Patience, Patience, Patience!

I have reached that wonderful point in my recovery where I can begin to do things for myself. It is also a very dangerous point. I feel so good! I’m staying awake all day. I’m actually getting some work done. It’s a very heady experience.

So why is it dangerous? There are still precautions to be followed. And I feel so good that there is every danger of the forgetting them. There will be no bending too far. No walking too far. No sitting in the wrong kind of chair.

Now is the time for patience. In order to maintain the gains of the first three weeks, I’ll need to behave for the next three weeks. Patience!

Isn’t every change like this? It takes patience and persistence to move forward. It takes time. It’s worth it.

The Kindness of Strangers

Maybe Blanche DuBois had it right. Depending on the kindness of strangers isn’t such a bad thing. I am dealing with a temporary mobility-limiting issue and have been using a cane for the last month or so. This has given me an excellent opportunity to observe the reactions of people I encounter and has left me occasionally needing their help.

There are people who will push past me to get on the bus first and others who motion me to go ahead of them. There are people who expect me to open the door for them and others who not only hold the door but wait patiently until I get there. There are people who regale me with tales of their own hip/knee surgery or the successful surgery and recovery of their friends/parents/colleagues.

A few incidents really stand out. Last week, I got into a conversation with the driver of my express bus. By the time I got off, she had taken my address so she could send me a get well card and promised that she would pray for a successful operation and send me things to make me know someone was thinking about me and to make me laugh as I recover.

At a music festival last weekend, a man came up to me to tell me that I would be much more comfortable if my cane was adjusted slightly – and proceeded to make the adjustment. He was right, by the way.

So, I once again have evidence of the truth that everything that happens has an effect on everything else. These simple acts of kindness made me feel wonderful, and, judging by the smiles on their faces, made the other person feel pretty good too.

I’ll be looking for more opportunities to do small things that make a difference. What will you do?

“Good” Customer Service Under Duress?

I bought a highly-rated chair from a company called Coaster. It’s a very nice-looking retro chair – reminds me of something that might have been in a public space in the 50’s. Two allen bolts were missing and I contacted Coaster, not realizing that the vendor was a company called AtHomeMart. Both the Parts department and the Customer Service department were unhelpful and unconcerned about the missing parts and said that they would be available in August. I emailed their customer service department, saying:

I received my chair, model 900335 and discovered that the two medium allen bolts were missing. The parts department informed me that these would not be available until some time in August. Customer service repeated the same thing. I need to sit in this chair post-surgery in July. This is unacceptable customer service.

… and, so far, only got the response below:

From lizyvetteg at Coaster:

This is an automated message confirming that we have received your inquiry.
http://www.coasterfurniture.com/

So, I called Amazon and Axel, who was lovely and sympathetic, asked me to please bear with him and send one more email. This one went through Amazon’s system, so my email and information were protected. They sent it to the supplier, rather than the manufacturer:

Here is a copy of the e-mail that you sent to AtHomeMart.

Order ID 002-6749098-4225869:
1 of Coaster 900335 Vinyl Accent Chair, Red [ASIN: B004T3CPD4]

————- Begin message ————-

I received this item on June 5th and discovered that the two medium-sized allen bolts required to secure the back in place were missing. I called the Parts Dept. and was told that these parts would not be available until mid-August. I called Customer Service and they affirmed this and indicated that they could take no further action. I also emailed customer service and received an automated response. I have received no additional response from the company. As I need to sit in this chair following July 3rd surgery, I find this response unacceptable.

My response from AtHomeMart, received within hours:

Susan,

I am not sure who you contacted previously, but this is our first correspondence from you. We are shipping out 2 medium size bolts+washer under tracking number xxxxx12345 with UPS. Thanks!

Best regards,
Henry Kung
AtHomeMart Customer Care

Now, it may be that AtHome Mart always maintains this level of customer service and simply was not aware of the issue with Coaster. I was impressed with the outcome and speed of response and will purchase through them again, as long as the supplier is NOT Coaster.

I am consistently impressed with the level of customer service provided by Amazon. They have spent hours on the phone with me, replaced items, and always maintained an attitude that suggests that you are doing THEM a huge favor by asking for help.

I was equally impressed with a recent interaction with drugstore.com over an incorrectly entered name in the delivery field on an order. Even though they couldn’t resolve this in the moment, the woman made several excellent suggestions and assured me that she will continue to track the delivery.

It seems to me, that with so many choices, no company with any sense would remain unresponsive to a customer. I hope that I’m just as responsive as Amazon with my clients.

You Might as Well Laugh

It’s May on the calendar and it’s been winter outside my window forever. Pretty much winter in my office too – I’ve got three layers of clothing on and the sandals in my closet are mocking me. No one I know actually saw the epic full moon Saturday because the cloud cover was so dense.
I started my morning and ended my day with two spectacular coaching calls. both clients had incredible breakthroughs and I was dancing. I’m still smiling.
But what I want to talk about is the time between those two calls. When I spoke to my own coach, I had a long, long list of complaints. And I just let loose with them. The list was so long that it made me laugh – and that’s how the call ended – with both of us sharing a lovely, long laugh. Sometimes, when things seem really bad and you can’t see a way out, you might as well laugh. So we did.
It was a very full day. I had six client calls that followed the same pattern. The clients all work for the same organization and are suffering various degrees of stress and overload in the wake of several significant retirements and two waves of layoffs. One has a boss who is prone to shouting. Another has an ever-increasing workload. A third has a subordinate who has taken passive-aggressive behavior to new levels. We’ve been working through these and similar issues with varying degrees of success. Today, though, was pretty much about complaining.
I let everyone vent. Sometimes, that’s the best coaching – just listen and go along for the ride. And I encouraged it. Exaggerated it. Egged them on. Until they laughed. Six depressed people became six people who were able to find some humor in their situation.
Sometimes – often, really, we can work on ourselves or with our coaches or with our clients to craft brilliant action plans. Sometimes we can take some baby steps towards change. And sometimes, we just can’t. And when you can’t, you can at least shift the mood.
When the going gets tough, you might as well laugh.

Previously posted on the Expanding Your Comfort Zone blog.